Hopeless romantic

I never knew that holding a torch for someone can be so miserable. Whenever i see your photos, i alway ask myself what is it that caught my attention. Each time the answer is always cheerfulness and cute. I think im a shallow person but when something as serious and sacred as love and relationship are concerned. Looks, boobs and figures are all thrown away. There are no such things as forever and that also apply to look and figures.

A conservative guy like me takes a serious approach to love. To me love is something so important but at the same time fragile that if possible i will not break it. Thats the reason why im single. To say it nicely im romantic person, to put it bluntly im a fool! Because i have a dogma that is if im in a relationship, i will make it my first and last. I like the idea of wedding my first love! I hope that you know too.

I love you with all my heart! You mean everything to me! What am i to you?

I catch a grenade for you

How i wish life don't give us options. Making us choose from 2 options. Yes/No Right/Wrong When there is only one answer to it. I knew it and will stand by it. Not gonna be sway by anythings that may make me change my decision.

2 weeks! Thats the time when i will ask you out for a date. The time to prepare it. The time to prepare myself to ask you out. Love is not blind! Because i saw with my eyes and heart what a nice, lovely and sweet gal that you are. I won't back off now. Its now or never. The time should coincide with our first meeting. My first time mustering up a courage to ask a gal to be my partner. Hahahah.

I want it to be special. To be memorable. To leave a sweet and lasting impression on your mind. Even for one second i still want to believe that you will reciprocate my feeling for you. I never stop believing in that. I am a stubborn person when love is concern. I can hold a torch for someone so steadfastly and long without changing.

That to me is what love is about. Not changing in the face of adversity. Cuz gal i will catch a grenade for you! And you can count on me like 1,2,3 and i be there!

Shortened Distance

Has our distance become shorter? I still remember the first time i fell for you. I haven't gotten up since then. I know people will chide me for holding a torch for you for like 11 months. But all that doesn't matter. What matter is knowing that you are happy and having a great time. Slowly but surely i know that love will blossom between us. If it haven't then the time hasn't come and i will gladly wait for it to come and for you to turn around and smile at me.

I am a guy that never admit defeat. So a rejection doesn't means anything. It just means that you aren't ready yet and wanna know me more. We just take things slowly and maybe my love for you will be reciprocate. Your smile is just like sunshine. A dosage of it never fail to light up my day. Your eyes are like a maze i lost myself while staring at it. Your hairstyle whatever you say about it. I still find it beautiful.

Whenever i make a wish i never fail to wish about you wishing that you will think about me like i think about you. And if we think of each other at the same time. That will be the happiest thing ever.

Ok enough about it, Onto my school life, Its been quite sucky and not that fantastic. Been group with the repeat students like myself and seniors. Not that they are bad. But specifically speaking i can't really start a conversation with them. Not chummy at all!! When doing projects we can discuss about things and so on. But after that when its over. I am the only one left out. Is it becuz that im a guy or is it becuz i never really try to talk to them and warm them to me?

The worst part is that i need to deferred another year for NS! That is a bummer. I was hoping of doing NS with all the people around my age. But nonetheless i will challenge it. To make sure i get enlisted with them whatever it take.

You are the mirage that never should exist. So mesmerising that i just couldn't bear to destroy it. I know im foolish. But who aren't! There are no reason for falling in love with someone. The only reason shld be her personality.

But your Hot n Cold action make me feel lost and confused. Im at loss as to what i shld do. I just don't understand why you don't treat me the same as i treat you. I know that you can't expect someone to love you the same as you love her. But your actions are making me confused.

Is it all an illusion or do i really stand a chance to win your heart. I always think that by going slow you will notice me and remember me. But its like impossible. You never really take the initiative to talk to me. Its was always me that does it. And im tired of that. Cuz im afraid that you find it irritating but on the other hand i wna let you know i never did forget you.

Why is it so difficult to take the initiative to talk to me? I dont think i fit in the category that gals dislike. Or do you like baddies? I try my hardest to make you happy. Think of ways so that i can meet you. But all this were struck off by your indifference.

So is it true that gals would run away from guys that make them happy and run towards the guys that make them cry? Its just a sad truth. Im unsure whether you are in the former. But your action make it seem like so.

But i dont want to give up until you had say a flat No straight at my face.